The Star-Belly Sneetches with the Virtue in Their Pockets

By Katelyn McCarthy
Opinion Columnist

In the past couple weeks, you have likely heard tell
That six Dr. Seuss books have heard their death knell.
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They’ll no longer be published, they’ll fade from the mind,
Since they’re turning kids bigoted, hateful, unkind.

But first, here’s a question, a question for you:
Have you read Dr. Seuss books...oh...since you were two?

If you’ve read Dr. Seuss, raise your hand, raise it high!
Almost all of us? My my oh my, my oh my!

Now, here is a question to send for a spin:
Do you hate people ‘cause of the hue of their skin?

You do not? That is strange. That is most very odd,
Since we’re told Dr. Seuss makes us racist and flawed.

How can you have read Dr. Seuss and yet you
Do not hate people, be they red, black, white, or blue?

“That’s no matter” say those who don’t like Dr. Seuss.
“His writings are just filled with hatred profuse!”

Racism’s wrong, I am sure we agree,
But that shouldn’t dictate the books we can see.

Your mind is your own, you can think for yourself.
You choose the books that should go on your shelf.

“But these books,” some say, “Are not for grown-ups, but tots!
Surely, they’ll harm them, oh, yes, lots and lots!”

A kid’s mom and her dad, not an author’s estate,
Should censor the books that are served on her plate.

That’s not to say these books are bad or they’re good,
But that you have a right to read what e’er you would.

In fact, I can’t say if they’re good or they’re bad,
Since all six of these books are nowhere to be had!

I wanted to read the books to understand
The reason some people are glad they are banned.

But my research is thin, I could not take a look,
Since I cannot spend thousands of bucks on a book!

Some say, “Freedom of speech is a dull, empty phrase,
And we cannot trust you your own kids to raise.

“We will tell you what’s right and what’s wrong, with you mum,
Since we know that the everyman’s really quite dumb.

“And we’ll take off the shelves all the books we don’t like,
Like they did in the USSR and Third Reich.”

When one starts to say what books should float and should sink,
Eventually, he’ll tell you what you should think.

And if you won’t think the thoughts he says you must,
He’ll write you off with little more than disgust.

And that is the reason they canceled the books,
To show the world they are the good guys, not crooks.

“We are woke! We are hip! We can walk it and talk it!
Look, here is our virtue, right here in our pocket!

“Look, look, you can see, we will show it to you,
When we cancel such books as If I Ran the Zoo!

“Why should we care about freedom of speech?
We aren’t the plain but the star-bellied sneetch.

“So watch out, ‘fore you say a thing we don’t like,
Or you from the pages of his’try we’ll strike.”

They cancel most everyone, when they are vexed,
They’ll cancel most everyone—will you be next?